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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22553983">The Green Stuff</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mriana/pseuds/Mriana'>Mriana</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Trek: The Original Series</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 17:00:18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>691</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22553983</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mriana/pseuds/Mriana</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>My first TOS fanfic which I originally wrote this years ago for the AAK/SA Avocado Fest.  The guys are eating something and "It is green."</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James T. Kirk &amp; Leonard "Bones" McCoy &amp; Spock, Leonard "Bones" McCoy &amp; Montgomery "Scotty" Scott</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Green Stuff</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Spock, what are you eating?" Kirk looked at Spock's food with a disgusted look.</p>
<p>"I believe it is Avocado dip and chips."</p>
<p>Kirk took a seat across from Spock, "I never did like that green stuff."</p>
<p>"I was never keen on his blood either, Captain," Doctor McCoy had just entered the mess hall and overheard the last part of the conversation.</p>
<p>"If I didn't know you better, Doctor, I'd say you were upset with me," the Vulcan replied as he dipped another chip into the green glop. "However, I will take your statement as being more of the Human endearment of teasing."</p>
<p>"I can't help it, Spock," McCoy replied. "Someone mentions green stuff, and I think of your blood."</p>
<p>"Actually, Bones," Kirk finally stated, "I was referring to the green goo in front of Spock."</p>
<p>McCoy frowns, "Looks almost as bad as his blood."</p>
<p>"Personally, I like the food. Very tasty for a Human food," Spock informed them.</p>
<p>"Spock, did I just hear a Human emotion coming from you?" Kirk asked. </p>
<p>"No, Captain, I was merely stating a fact. Avocados are very tasty."</p>
<p>"Figures," McCoy looked repulsed. "If every Vulcan ate that, their blood would probably be greener than what it is."</p>
<p>"I don't understand the Human revulsion towards food just because of how it looks."</p>
<p>"It looks like someone has had digestive upset, Spock!" McCoy exclaimed.</p>
<p>"And tastes just as bad," Kirk added with a sour look on his face.</p>
<p>"Don't forget to add that it is slimy," Scotty added with a shake of his head. "Why anyone would dip crisps into them is beyond me! It completely ruins them!"</p>
<p>"Like limes ruin everything also," an ensign suddenly sneered.</p>
<p>Scotty quickly turned toward the ensign and asked as though he had just been insulted, "What's that, me lad?"</p>
<p>"Sir?" The ensign asked as he frustratingly removed a lime from his drink.</p>
<p>"Laddie, what are ye doin'!" Scotty exclaimed. "That's the best part! Even has your vitamin C in it!"</p>
<p>"Scotty, I never knew you liked limes," Kirk stated with surprise. "Here, you can have mine."</p>
<p>"Don't mind if I do, but ya missin' the best part!"</p>
<p>"Curious, I thought the British were the ones who liked limes," Spock asked.</p>
<p>"Whate'er gave ya that idea?" Scotty asked with surprise.</p>
<p>"If history serves me correctly, they carried them on their ships," Spock replied.</p>
<p>"Well, I never knew Vulcan's liked Avocados," Scotty retorted. "I thought it was a Spanish dish."</p>
<p>"He's got you there, Spock," McCoy pointed out to him.</p>
<p>"Touché," Spock replied.</p>
<p>"I still think avocado dip is vile stuff," Kirk stated with revulsion on his face.</p>
<p>"Have you ever tasted it, Sir?" Spock asked.</p>
<p>"Well, not really."</p>
<p>"Then you should try it, at least once, before using such descriptive words," Spock insisted. Then Spock looked toward McCoy and Scotty wondering if they would also try it.</p>
<p>"I go for good old country food," McCoy stated with enthusiasm and patted his belly. "Sticks to your ribs."</p>
<p>Scotty had been sucking on a lime and appeared to have been taken off guard, "Oh, no, Sir. I'm um... full from all the limes I've just eaten."</p>
<p>Kirk could not come up with a good excuse not to taste the green mush in the middle of the table. He reluctantly picked up a chip and then hesitated, "Um, you didn't double dip did you?"</p>
<p>"Double dip?" Spock curiously asked.</p>
<p>"Yeah, double dip. Dip your chip, take a bite, and then dip again."</p>
<p>"No, Sir," Spock seemed insulted. "That would not only be illogical, but unhealthy to share with one's friends."</p>
<p>Kirk sighed and then continued to attempt to taste the green food.</p>
<p>"Hold it, Sir!" Scotty stopped him. "Maybe a bit of salt will take away some of the bite."</p>
<p>"Scotty," Spock began to inform him. "Limes and lemons 'bite', as you say, avocados do not."</p>
<p>Kirk ate the avocado laden chip while having a scowl on his face. When he had swallowed, he took another chip, dipped it into the avocado dip, then his coffee.</p>
<p>Everyone gawks opened mouth at Kirk with his last action.</p>
<p>"What?" He asks. "Coffee covers the taste of anything."</p>
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